After eight years of leaving Philippines, I had never gone back. But my fate changed on the eve of my graduation day (June, 2014). Ironically, I left Philippines in June also.
Living in Canada, I have often dreamt about Philippines being the magical place it was during my childhood years.
I believe Philippines is a blessed place. The natural beauty is unrivaled elsewhere in the world. This summer, I’ve had the tremendous privilege of coming back home to my country of origin, and there had been incredible changes. In the Philippines, my family was poor, (how we came to Canada? That’s another story!) But this time, I was able to go to the “elite” section of Manila. We stayed at some of the most exquisite hotels in the Philippines (Heritage Hotel, Microtel, and H2O) I almost did not feel like stepping inside the lobby, as I felt so underdressed with only flipflops, a plain t-shirt, and khaki shorts.
Microtel Manila – rooftop swimming pool, overlooking Mall of Asia
Being a “probinsyana” by heart, I was not used to the luxuries. It soon became apparent that my “simple” taste in fashion was not welcomed. Most guests at these hotels were dressed smartly and it was obvious most wore luxury branded clothing. In contrast, I am very simple and quite demure. But I felt like I had to dress the part in order to fit in. Ironically, the only people I found wearing flip flops and shorts were Caucasian male visiting the Philippines! There is a misconception in the Philippines that Americans and other foreigners are wealthy, that simple isn’t the case.
My sister, who came with me, and I, could not conceal our amusement at Filipinos who try so hard to conform to Western society, whether by clothing, or simply speaking to the hotel concierge in fragmented English acting like a maldita. I was befuddled by such behaviour. But in all honesty, I, too, was also very much tempted to fall into that trap and to explain ‘why’ is beyond my comprehension in anthropology. It was almost like we, balikbayans, have superiority complex. Perhaps it was also the overexaggerated “niceness” of salespeople and hotel staff greeting us with tattooed smiles that catalyzed this behaviour.
Most Filipino balikbayans are not wealthy at all, in fact chances are, we slave long hours barely scraping by to pay for our apartment’s rent abroad, or to send money back to home. Coming back to the Philippines, perhaps it is a way to restore dignity, but I realized just how wrong that mentality is, because those sales people, the family maid, and hotel staff do not deserve such inhumane treatment.
But what I am wondering is why must one become so arrogant once he or she has stepped foot abroad, or better yet, why do the families who have someone abroad that could support their lavish lifestyle act as if they are so entitled? ( that! Hehe)
At the Heritage Hotel, I could not help but dress up as not to feel out of place.
There is also a deep historical insinuations that runs intrinsically in the veins of Filipinos that foreigners’ cultures are better than our own. This is why Dr. Vicky Belo, the country’s most renowned plastic surgeon, is overly successful. Commercials on TV feature fair skin as being the ideal beauty of women. I could not help but feel ashamed of my tanned skin which my Canadian collegues admired.
The western influence in the Philippines is visibly prevalent, and it grieves my heart to witness that my own people are turning away from our deepest values and beliefs. Culturally, it was like I never left North America when coming back to the Philippines. What happened to our long-held belief of respect for elders, strong religious faith, family-first, honour, kindness and harmony, and the spirit of bayanihan? Long gone is harana that made a maiden’s heart become twitterpated as the male suitor sang his heart out in front of the open window bringing an old, out-of-tune guitar. The flattered maiden feels giddy, but must not outwardly show it to maintain delicadeza.
Most provinces still hold on to some of these values, but it seems Manila had been deviating from our old ways. It was terrific to see wonderful improvements in the city, and I especially enjoyed Mall of Asia, but must we conform entirely to namely American culture?
Have we forgotten we are no longer slaves? We are our own independent nation, and it is time we became proud of who we are.
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